Love and loss intersect in equal measure in Mike Mills’ funny and wonderfully moving sophomore effort (after his 2005 debut Thumbsucker), Beginners. AnOther spoke to Mike Mills about the emotional legacy of parents and the romance of melancholy...
Love and loss intersect in equal measure in Mike Mills’ funny and wonderfully moving sophomore effort (after his 2005 debut Thumbsucker), Beginners. Loosely an autobiographical piece; the film centres around a son, Oliver (played by Ewan McGregor) coming to terms with the death of his father Hal from cancer (Christopher Plummer in a career-best performance) who came out as gay after four decades of marriage. In the midst of his grief, Oliver meets an alluring French actress (the luminous Mélanie Laurent) who comes equipped with a private sadness of her own. It’s a testament to Mills’ fearlessness with such intimate material that the film never descends into mawkish sentimentality but instead emerges as a sweet, wistful love story that’s as tough and tender as it is honest. AnOther spoke to Mike Mills about the emotional legacy of parents and the romance of melancholy.
Was making the film a way of continuing some of the interesting conversations you had with your father?
That’s how the story began. When my father came out, we started having these vivid talks about what I was doing wrong and what you can do and can’t do and what’s possible. And then he left but I was still in the middle of it.
How did your father’s coming out make you reflect on how you lived your own life?
It was cool to see my shy, staid father be like a punk and be uncontrolled. What I saw was that his new gay relationships were a lot more messy and hot-blooded and filled with mistakes and breakthroughs. It happened in much quicker succession and ups and downs. Watching your father do that is weird and influential. I discovered that love is more turbulent than I ever understood it to be.
What do you feel you learnt about them by the end of the film?
It was interesting to write from my parents’ perspective and stop being their son. To write their characters, you had to embody them, their fears and their desires. And you don’t really think a lot about that. That was a weird exercise but it was positive. It’s not like the film really taught me something or gave me a catharsis or revelation. A lot of that had to happen before I could make a film so I could make a film that’s a story for people and not just my unconscious. It sounds sentimental but it made me feel closer to them – even though they were gone and I was just thinking about them in my head. Sometimes in crunch moments, I feel my parents – or at least my memory of them. It’s quite comforting and I feel like I have a solid tie to them.
What would your parents have made of the film?
I know my father would have had a long list of notes like a producer would have. I don’t think I would have made this film if they were around to see it. My mother is much more private which is why she’s a smaller character in the film. I knew I made it with a lot of love and curiosity and an attempt to understand them, not just as their son but as humans in a historical context. It made me feel like I have permission to do that. I think that they would get that I made it with an attempt to empathise with their predicament in time.
How satisfying or strange is it to see that these deeply personal feelings you had in the course of making the film translate to the wider audience?
It’s scary to do that. All my heroes talk about their emotional lives – Federico Fellini, Jean-Luc Godard, Leonard Cohen. I guess that’s what I like. I’m not brave but when I make these films, I get brave all of a sudden. When people connect, it’s very heartening and very sweet – it’s why you make the film. Especially in places like Europe or Japan or wherever people are really different to you – it’s magical – like humanity is not a bad thing. You can communicate and there can be those connections. I met so many kids of gay parents and a lot of them would come and support the film and obviously we would connect. And it was a trip because they were from different walks of life. I often feel quite alone but this experience made me feel quite un-alone.
The chemistry between the leads is so natural and lived-in. What was the rehearsal process like?
It was super key. I shot the film chronologically and we shot Christopher and Ewan first. Before we started I had a week with Christopher, Ewan, the dog and some of the gay friends. We spent all day doing improvisation – I made Christopher and Ewan go to Barneys and Christopher got obsessed with these skinny jeans. It was quite a good experience – it was what happened between me and my father – shopping for clothes with my new gay dad. They started their own relationship while I wasn’t there. With Melanie and Ewan, I had them improvise breaking up with each other over and over – that’s where Oliver and Anna come from. We went to rollercoaster rides on Magic Mountain and they’re both terrified of roller coasters. That’s kind of like love – it’s exhilarating, physical and it changes your body and it’s terrifying. And it was really good – by the end of it they were crying and laughing, that’s what love does to you.
A lot of your work is about the romance of the melancholy, how do you think your attitude to sadness differs from that of your parents?
It’s in the film – they didn’t allow it. They didn’t allow you to talk about your inner conflicts or inner life. It just wasn’t part of their culture. They were born in 1924 and 1925 and grew up in a different time. In all my work I try to make space for sadness and confusion. This story isn’t about depression – it’s about grief. It’s about a wallop that just comes from the outside. Oliver is trying hard to be happy.
How do you feel you’ve moved on as a director since Thumbsucker?
In so many ways. In some ways it’s the same story. A guy trying to figure out a more liberated relationship with his parents while trying to have a romantic relationship. Kind of a quiet, shy guy who doesn’t fit into a typical American narrative of a man. I think I understand and enjoy directing more, I love being the captain of the ship! This film was very personal but it’s not afraid to try and be adventurous.
Beginners directed by Mike Mills is released in UK cinemas on Friday July 22, 2011.
Text by Kin Woo
